Dumb Love
Recently my wife and I took some personality tests for fun. Not surprisingly her test results showed she is a person of logic. Someone that requires high action and total logic. That’s what works for her in a relationship. Also not surprisingly my test results indicated that I was a person of affirmation. Someone that is whimsical and playful who enjoys positive affirmations, or I like to call it “dumb love”.
There are many cultural differences in the way I was brought up as compared as to how my wife was brought up. I had a very cushy upbringing. Hers was quite the opposite. I had everything in bulk. Never really taught to not be wasteful. She was brought up in a world where things were not so plentiful. Being resourceful was way of life. Waste nothing !! I will give you a couple quick bullets on what life is like in my household now:
- Paper towels are not expendable. That can be used over and over.
- Dishwasher is not meant for washing dishes. Its used for drying clean dishes. You will also find a colander full of vegetables draining in there from time to time.
- Plastic dishes are not use once and toss. Uh uh… you wash those plastic dishes and they get reused.
So now you get the idea, but we are getting off track a bit as to the subject of this post, but I wanted to convey the “strategic” thinking of some who grow up not having an abundance of everything. This post is about “dumb love”. What I mean by that is you say silly things to each other that may not be totally true like “Gee honey, that was so nice of you… how did I get so lucky to have you in me life” or “wow do you look stunning in those clothes” or “I just want to tell you how much I love you babe” . You know… silly things. Not logical things. Maybe stretching the truth sometimes!
My wife’s logic is something that can be very useful. Like she will do our taxes this year. I would have no clue. Or she handles the travel arrangements as she knows how to break things down to get the best deal. Her determination led her to come to this country in her 20’s and she worked retail and put herself through college and got her degree and her masters degree, with no debt ! WTF? I never head of anyone doing that. Me? I got my high school diploma in 1978 and they were handing them out like freebies. “You get a diploma!” and ‘You get a diploma”f
My lovely wife is teaching me to be more logical, resourceful, forward thinking.
I’m teaching her to be spur of the moment, no planning, just lets to out the front door and see where we end up. Giving dumb love affirmations.
I think that we are good for each other. I need what she has, and she needs what I have. Only thing is its must easier to teach someone like me who is wide open to change with no blinders on. But teaching someone that grew like a soldier is tougher. She has a more narrow scope on letting loose and just being silly and loosey-goosey.
It will come.
DUMB LOVE PEOPLE !!!