Already Always Listening

When we have conversations with each other at the work place, on the phone, at the Starbucks, chance run-ins’s,  most of us are not really listening, therefore we are not really communicating.  Here is a experiment for you. 

The next time you have a conversation with anyone,  take note on what your doing.  What most do is as the other person is speaking, we are thinking about the next thing were going to say as soon as the other person stops talking.  When they finish then you open your mouth and you begin to say words back, and then the other person begins thinking about what they are going to say next.  Its labeled “Already Always Listening”.  So what is happening is their are four conversations going on at the same time, and nobody is really listening!!   And if your not listening, then your really not communicating.

Now in this conversation force yourself not to think about what you want to say next, and truly listen to what the person is saying, and respond to that.  Keep it up in this one conversation.  It wont be easy because you are breaking a habit you have been doing all your life. 

Here is the payoff.  At the end of this conversation the other person will walk away from that chat and be thinking how smart, warm, clever, intelligent you are.  They wont really know why, but what they will have experienced with you is real conversation.  True communication.

Remember this.  Communication feels like love.  They will begin to gravitate towards you and really not know why.  But to  truly communicate with someone is rare these days. 

Sometimes you hear someone say that they had a really “deep” conversation with someone.  No, they did not.  They had a conversation.  One where each other was really listening and the only way we know how to describe this rare event is  to label it “deep”.

So go ahead.  This experiment can be fun.  Try it out today during your interaction today at work.  You will notice a big difference in all your relationships.