{"id":538,"date":"2012-03-11T15:49:25","date_gmt":"2012-03-11T19:49:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/?p=538"},"modified":"2024-05-03T19:45:56","modified_gmt":"2024-05-03T23:45:56","slug":"for-the-love-of-us","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/for-the-love-of-us\/","title":{"rendered":"For The Love of US"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Why is it so easy for me to know what we are going to say or do next?\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s easy.\u00a0\u00a0 Because we are all alike.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Somewhere along the way I stumbled onto the seemingly elusive distinction that none of us are unique from each other much at all.\u00a0 However there was a time in my head that I did not have that truth and I was stumbling through life thinking I was special and I was one of a kind.\u00a0\u00a0 This kind of thinking unfortunately is mainstream with the human being.\u00a0\u00a0 The more we live in that box with our blinders on and believe that we are the only one like you on the planet, it puts in motion a complicated , time consuming, energy draining,\u00a0\u00a0 defensiveness.<\/p>\n

However it\u2019s hard to say where the payoff is with having this distinction versus not.<\/p>\n

Before when I was part of the main herd I was more like everyone else living in a perception individual uniqueness, I too was an individual cell with my guard up constantly putting out communication that emulated a defense mechanism that unconsously on 24 hour duty protecting oneself from others.\u00a0\u00a0 This mindset deflects the opportunity to feel real love and warmth and everyone you meet on any given day.\u00a0 Believe it not we are depriving ourselves of the love that stranger on the elevator or that person while passing each other in the hallway.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Once we realize that we are all the same,\u00a0 a paradyne shift in thinking occurs immediately.\u00a0\u00a0 When we realize were all the same then we also realize that we all have the same fears.\u00a0 This affectively and exactly rids your mind and soul of all the crap we were carrying around that we thought we had to figure out freeing up precious space, for something else.\u00a0 We literally are lighter on your feet because we can just drop that crap right on the floor and step over that mound of nonsense that we don\u2019t have to figure out.\u00a0\u00a0 Not that we would have had enough time on the planet to do so in the first place.<\/p>\n

Things like our relationships with our parents, bosses, and dog.\u00a0 How are we going to get ahead and why is that guy staring at me? \u00a0 Putting our spin on everything that ultimately comes out the same all the time.\u00a0\u00a0 We get to be right, and the other gets to be wrong.\u00a0 That\u2019s the payoff that too many of us are striving for in every aspect of our lives.<\/p>\n

Sadly though the cost is communication.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Once we make ourselves right and the other wrong communication stops.\u00a0 What is communication?\u00a0 Think we don\u2019t need to have communication with certain people?\u00a0\u00a0 Communication is everything.\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s what we communicate that defines us.\u00a0 It\u2019s what comes out of our mouths that determine how we show up.<\/p>\n

Ironically there is not a lot of communicating going on in the first place.\u00a0\u00a0 Some people will occasionally have a \u201cconversation\u201d but there will be something different about it and it\u2019s tagged with the word \u201cdeep\u201d. But really it was just a conversation but with real communication.\u00a0 In this rare event for some reason the 2 parties involved that came out the other side of a \u201cdeep \u201cconversation were really just listening to each other for the first time and therefore actually responding to that the other were saying and the value of that event is tangible.<\/p>\n

Some of us reading this will be all we need to get some distinctions.\u00a0 Perhaps some reading this are judging and loading up on all that is wrong with this form of expression, or even me!\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But what if I asked you to check that thinking for just a couple more sentences and actually consider without prejudice, and allow some neutral consideration.\u00a0 Can we do that right now?\u00a0 Try this on.<\/p>\n

\"\"There are 2 people sitting across from each other.\u00a0 They are talking.\u00a0 One person\u2019s lips are moving and words are coming out.\u00a0 The other person takes their turn and express\u00a0 them self.\u00a0\u00a0 They do this for a while, going back and forth, taking turns, and if you were observing you would come to the conclusion that 2 people have having \u201ca\u201d conversation.\u00a0\u00a0 What if I told you that actually what you saw were actually 4 conversations.\u00a0\u00a0 Allow me to try to explain.<\/p>\n

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and while they are speaking and verbalizing, we are having our own conversation in our heads thinking of what were going to say as soon as that person stops talking?\u00a0 When they do and you begin to speak the other person right on queue starts up that little voice in their heads thinking about what they are going to say as soon as you stop talking.\u00a0 So on and so forth.\u00a0 So really neither one is truly listening to what the other is saying and therefore they are not really even communicating.\u00a0 You know this right?\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Sound familiar?<\/p>\n

Now that we hopefully\u00a0 have this distinction free of charge we will remember this and when someone starts talking to us and we will realize that when we begin to have our own conversation on what we are going to say while the other is still talking,\u00a0 we will stop ourself.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You will find that your reply\u2019s will be on target and the likelihood of the other person walking away thinking, wow, that was a great conversation.\u00a0 They won\u2019t know what happened but you will.\u00a0\u00a0 You will find the more you do this the more people will migrate towards you. Seeking you out to converse with. Why?<\/p>\n

Because communication feels <\/em>like love.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s too late because now YOU have the distinction.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Why is it so easy for me to know what we are going to say or do next?\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s easy.\u00a0\u00a0 Because we are all alike.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Somewhere along the way I stumbled onto the seemingly elusive distinction that none of us are unique from each other much at all.\u00a0 However there was a time in my […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-538","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daily-dose"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/538","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=538"}],"version-history":[{"count":19,"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/538\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":907,"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/538\/revisions\/907"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=538"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=538"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelagee.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=538"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}